Dont ask, dont tell, Dont work...

There was a recent wave of crap rolling onto shore about gays in the military, and how they are not honoring the men and woman who serve, protect and die for our country as homosexuals. It's sad that commanding personel have the right to snoop through a soldiers emails, letters, and blogs to see if they are gayonce they have profiled a soldier either through rumor or through suspicion.. using sych a simplistic reason to throw them out of the service that they chose to join to defend our country!

You mean we dont have enuf 2do2 get that goofy sand turd still running around threatening our country, illegals pooring into our borders(and my only stance against that is the lack of respect to those who did all the paperwork, and worked their asses off to get into this country legally) pollution, big tobacco, militias in our own country that are anti-american, gang influence, cartel influence, oil giants dumping their loads, and politicians having a pissing contest.

We do not need to be living in 2010!!!.... the 21 century!!! with point blank discrimination! WHO CARES who a soldier loves, if they're doing their DUTY, and SERVING our COUNTRY! If you feel the way I feel, get intouch with the folks who control these laws, and let the voice of the NEW GENERATION be HEARD!! ..because as far as it stands right now.. the NEW GENERATION ...has only been a faint whisper.

Hello World! I know Ive been away...

But Never for too long. I havent spoken about it here yet, so I will. I was hospitalized in Feb 2010, in a coma for 21 days, rehab for 30 days, and woke up feeling like a million bux! God and everyones prayers really gave me something special, and a new outlook on life! While for even me everyday is a continual battle to keep from repeating the loop I was in before.

I have gained new perspective, new friends, figured out who my real one were, and feel like I am on a personal crusade to be there for others, comfort and talk with friends in need. All my problems have been solved through the gift of perspective that god again has granted me with.

I value those special people in my life such as Mark, Michael, Bradley, and a few others who are still trying to show their truest colors. I still value the other ones, but I really feel like some people are like trees, eventually no matter how much you grow, you tend to grow in different directions, so I and letting those boats sail silently through my life and into any direction that they wish for the winds to carry them.

I've suffered a few setbacks in my health since I recovered, minor things such as a nasty viral cold of some kind that the whole universe seems to have gotten from one another, and just this week, discovered that I have STAPH.. the fun never ends, lol. But I am in good spirits, Good faith, in the company of good friends, and even on occasion partaking in some GOOD eats! hehehe.

If ANYONE EVER reads this, you can check me out nowadays at:

www.myspace.com/gimneye4ever

Im on twitter and facebook, but if you wana know me beyond that, you're just gonna have to email me at:

xxgimneyexx@aol.com ...lol

Well, hope that you all have had a safe year, and its almost over as another bares down upon us...lol.

Much love to you all, and will return shortly!

CUDDLES

GimNeye

OMG!..BARACK OBAMA is MY Baby Daddy!

This morning President Obama Addresses the GITMO with the American people with the Unites States Constitution, Declaration of Independance, and Bill of Rights standing in the backgorund. He stood up for them in addressing his unbending faith in the due process of detainees that have been drifting in legal limbo for years since the 9/11 poop fest by the former administration. He addressed secrecy, propaganda, fear made decisions, fear induced policy, fear injection speeches, abuse, the lack of due process, the price we will pay socially with the world by keeping this place open and how NONE of it will solve our problems as a nation.

He basically said that this country, this president, this administration was NOT above the law. No, those were not his exact words, but you get the jist. He had the SAME opinion that John Stewart addressed on the Daily Show where he addressed the idea that we have room for serial killer, mass murderers, but we dont have room for these terrorists?? Obama said that NO ONE has EVER successfully escaped one of our super max prisons, those who have no reason to be detained after being investigated will be released but that NO ONE who will cause a threat to our national security will be released. Some will be tried in our traditional court system for crimes of terrorism, others wil be tried by the military courts in regards to acts of war against our nation. With all that, he basically said that this was the way the justice system was supposed to work.

While I was sitting on my bed, moistening it with fantasies of the freedom that was founded by the fathers of this nation, I smiled and thought to myself... This was the same confusing things I was pondering when every freedom we had was going down the tubes because of the former Admin. Even the thought that we have spirraled out of contrl away from justice crossed my worried mind several times. Then the fact that he addressed the same thoughts, the same values I had not only made me feel less like a nut job with some crazy old ideals, but it made me feel secure that the commander and chief held the same principles I hold, this good nation holds, and in an instant, I thought..."OMG! .. Barack Obama is my babys Daddy!"

This man can speak his way out of anything, or into it! Maybe my zeal is soring too high above the clouds but his speech was sooo satisfying, that i didn't wait for shitty Mcgee - Cheneys big counter speech. Yes, that ass clown actually scheduled a COUNTER speech. The man should have enough remaining dignity to cup his balls, and run for the hills yelping! All I have to say to this man is that there is a big difference between leadership, and ones OWN reality! Get a new job dude, you sucked in your last one!

RANDOM POINTLESS UPDATE!

OK.. I do NOT have CHF! I do NOT have ASTHMA..(so they say).. I had pneumonia that lingered for months because the capacity of my LARGE lungs allowed it to go undetectible for MONTHS before i got extremely ill! I am almost over the pneumonia, and Still trying to determine WHY my oxygen will not go back up above 89% and STAY THERE! Wish me luck! THANKS!!

The Penalty of the Truth

I am an alcoholic.

I am a compulsive eater, and have worked hard to contain both of those.

I think i am a undiagnosed Bio-polar freak.

I have problems with Authority...I question it A LOT!

I suffer from anxiety and depression, as well as hyper-tension.

I am totally aware and capable to TRY, and totally aware of my constant failure to do so.

My room is a mess.

I am a recovering sexual compulsive.

I think the world revovles around music, food, and hot people.

I believe that Earth was a Eutopian experiment created and re-created by God, that we were ultimately meant to enjoy the fruits of, but instead we have mired down those thoughts with money, power, mateials, and jobs. I HATE WORK, who doesnt?.. Unless it's the kind where you are actually HELPING SOMEONE or doing something CONSTRUCTIVE besides pushing a pencil, or punching a clock. The only way I would love to punch clocks are with my bloody fist!

I hate going into a restraunt, ordering a drink, only to find out they have totally changed their menu, and everything on it sucks. Yes, i leave, but its the principle of it all...lol.

I hate it when people are taking a crap in your bathroom, and they want to leave the door open.. as if you want to smell or hear it.

I never understood the obsession over the macarena.

I have aggressive homeless bunch a crack addicts (YES REALLY CRACK ADDICTS) that live up by my local store. They like to run up to your car from across the street so they can catch and confront you for change after you come out of the store, so I in my mean way, anticipate this move, and I run to the car, jump in, and get them to take off, before they can get to the car, and i laugh at them while theyre banging on the glass as if it were some sick twisted race...Aren't I aweful?

I hate when people smoke, know I can't breathe well, and blow it intensionally in my face. Do I want to harm them? No, but I have often thought that hell for them will be a white room with no windows, doors, and nothing but bleach, raw veggies, air filters, smoke free, drink and drug free, and full of other smokers who keep asking them in vane for some nicotine gum.

Male sexual enhancement drugs... WHY??

I thought BOTH Bush's sucked, and i hope i never see another one.

i tend to blirt out things right at the same moment some poor soul has the floor, not realizing what a dick head they must think I am.

I live in a dream world only half the time, the other half is spent doing music, crafts, and raman noodles.

I HATE PNEUMONIA! ..It just wont get the fucking worn out welcome clue!

I have shaved my testicles before... it was a cool breeze moment followed by weeks of irritation.

I have made the mistake of masterbating with Muscle rub too...JUST LIKE YOU GUYS.

I am OVER the doctors definition of OBEASE, no one can help me, no one seems to want to try to, and I cant help myself, because I dont have any inspiration other than infomercials.

I hate corporations but cant resist fucking Star Bucks coffee...what is that??

I think there's a difference between: "I am GAY", and "Hey man, what the fuck is your problem?..I don't even know girls who act that feminine!"

I believe that if anyone is STILL a die hard racist must be kinda retarded or had lead in their drinking water...( I would like to apologize for the use of the word retarded, obviously there is lead in MY water.)

QUIT CHOPPING DOWN AAAALLL OF THE FUCKING FORRESTS UNLESS YOU ARE REPLANTING!...YOU JACK ASSES!!

If you are going out to dinner at a big public restraunt, leave anyone under the age of 7 WITH A BABY SITTER, in the CAR, LOCKED in a BASEMENT...whatever you gotta do!... FOR REAL! NO ONE likes to hear your kids cry, an no one thinks it's cute, unless they are really as much of an asshole as you are for bringing them.

I look at porn.

If I have to fart, I am not going to hold it in and give myself cramps for ANYONE!

The thought of ever getting another telesales, or any other kind of office job where someone is defined either by the piece of paper on their wall, or by the new hairstyle and how much attitude they can get away with throwing at you, as if you were one of their kids, just makes me want to crawl back into the vagina...and I am gay.

People that dont use their turn signals or that ALWAYS get RIGHT UP TO THE ROAD, and make a sudden sharp turn equally without their turn sugnals need to be fined $7,000 dollars, raped in the ass by bubba, and made to do 5 years on community service.

My #1 Rule is that I will never hate a person, i will just really hate how retarded they are. (Sorry again about the Re-Re word!)

People that piss in a community pool and get caught, should be made to drink it with dinner every night.

People that come over when they know they have the flu or some nasty ass illness that I dont have yet, knowing that I have a crappy immune system should have a sworm of hornets released on them.

Every idiot that adds shit to the bible that ISNT in there already should be.... well, I'll leave that up to the other Judge.

I am often times a sweetheart in public and a real jerk in my thoughts.

People that argue someone elses religion with them should be flogged to equate the amount of disrespect theyre showing their neighbor....unless you're a scientologist which is just the end on the spectrum of.."What?"

I have my selfish moments, but they'll never result in natural disasters, wars, pageant losses,
intentionally hurt feelings, false senses of reality, perminant assholeiness, self loathing, or battered wife syndrome.

I cant think of anything else that makes me a target, but give me some time, Im sure I'll cook something up that someone doesnt like...lol.

MERRY CHRISTMAS! ..A Message!

**I sent this email to a friend who emailed me, attempting to communicate. This is what I sent back. i hope you enjoy the message, and that you see some truth in it for yourselves. MERRY CHRISTMAS!***

You Know ....

I had some harsh thoughts about you before. I'm sure you've had some about me. Something I have learned over time, is that we hold ourselves back from so many things that we love. There was a time when I looked to you for advice and guidance, and you always had the best things to say. it isn't in the mistakes we've made with one another, it's about that fact that we were privileged enough to have experienced them as two friends. Isn't it interesting that with time, we all realize that no one person is more lost or more found, we are all just part of this race. A race to get to no where fast. It doesn't mean that everything we do in life is all for not, it just means that we don't really see the bigger picture until we really do stop and smell the roses.

There was a time when I felt like you left me behind and that you didn't really care about me anymore. In the time since, I have come to understand what growth is, and what change is. I see myself where I am, and always expected others to like and accept me for it, never realizing that the real problem was I didn't accept MYSELF, and that it didn't make a fuck really what others thought, just that if I ever could form a logical thought in my head, people would be more impressed....OR maybe not, regardless, I would at least have had an identity.

I was a leech. A one man pity party. I was someone that was so busy feeling sorry for myself, that I couldn't see what I had right in front of me. having said that, being in the band this time has changed my perspective of the world. My band mates are my best friends. Mark and I sit outside my house and talk for hours about people, life, and all the fucked up things we've done to ourselves and to others, and we really listen. My friend Michael and i have breathed life into a friendship that never was, into one that has become. We have great moments of synchronicity and clarity. We all really care to listen and be heard. I've come to realize that all I ever really wanted was love, and acceptance. I got the love from home, but it was more like ..you be this and I'll love you, otherwise, you're just a bad ass little fucker that needs a good beating.

You saved me from a lot of moments in my life when i was at the threshold of insanity. Who knows what kind of a fucking psycho serial killer I could have ended up being had it not been for my draw of occasional logic from you. All that being said, I still fuck up. I am still too fucking fat to be eating at barnhills..lol. But I have come a long way. I'm no longer self deprecating and delusional. I no longer need or require someone's approval, and I love everyone's acceptance. When people use the mind control BS I just look at them now, and shake my head, because I know that they just don't get it, so why should I waste my time? But educating my soul, and filling my heart back up with my OWN inner peace, my Own inner acceptance and joy have become a great part of who I am now, and since I have accepted it, I find myself reaching out to people more and more, and being genuine when it calls for it, and just going with the flow when they're talking out of their asses, or trying to run away and hide from love and themselves.

I'm not that boy you left behind so long ago. I have no ego that's big enough to bruise. I no longer fear being alone or dying. I don't NEED people, but you know, it sure as shit is good to have them in my life...more like a blessing. I know all this babbling may come as a surprise for you, because when was the last time I said anything with meaning that really caught your eye, or at least made you interested enough to keep reading? My point really is just to let you know I am GLAD you got away from ANYTHING that is causing Chaos. There's already too much confusion. You have worried a long time about if what you were doing was "the right thing" because it was hard for you to get the people in your life to be interested enough to make a "sound" and "non-personal" observation.

You've moved and sought other destinations because you were really only looking for change. Change is different for everyone, and one formula may work for one person, and not for the other one. The point is that change is the constant. Bob Dylan said.."He not busy being born, is busy dying." Being born is obviously change. I am always happy to see that you have renewed your life and that you have changed your surroundings, and to see that you have made such strides in your life to better yourself. You were always the strongest one, and no one will ever be able to take that from you.

I am just glad that you are taking care of yourself, and your love have finally come to a threshold of knowing the value of a real relationship and what it is all really about. No one is perfect, but we serve a perfect God, and we have a perfect love. Love is patient, love is kind. love is not envious or proud. It isn't rude and self seeking. Love is not easily provoked and has no evil intentions. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in TRUTH. Love protects, trusts, Love stands the test of time.... Love never fails.

I love you. I hope that time has forgotten our regrets, faults, inadequacies, idiosyncrasies, misfortunes, misconducts, and miscommunications. I hope to see you too, and I hope that we see each other differently, no matter what our sack of flesh says, no matter what time can throw at us. No matter what may come our way, that we as friends, will continue to stand the test of time. Be good to yourself; be good to your lover.

And I'll see you soon.

~Robert

Running away to some place insane.

A friend told me they were moving away to Asia because they wanted to work as a volunteer helping others in need, while the prospect sounds self - improving he added.. "And I want to go there and forget who I am, and leave everything behind. I want to get away because I think I am slipping into insanity, because I dont want to be materialistic, yet I need money to survive, and I just want to get away from all of this." Maybe everyone will understand where I am going with this, but this is my take on that way of thinking.

"You know we can't simply wave away the pain with a magic wand. The things that we carry with us are the things that make us who we are. If we lose them, we lose ourselves." ~ James Kirk

To simply throw it all away is to erase ourselves from life. I dont see anything about us that needs erasing...even though I have never met many of you. Money is a neccesary evil. IF you have found means to survive without it, then perhaps it is the clensing you need since you know yourself better than I. ...and If going to Asia makes you happy, and helping others is suffient for your soul than so be it, but to say you dont want to be who you are is an impossbile feet that no man can change, and it will surely wheel him to the empty parking lot of life.

Even in the darkest, most quiet night, the mind speaks to us, and reminds us of where we have been, and who we are. If you are indeed starting a new life, unlearn what you have learned, but keep those lessons u have learned in your heart for they will not make you bitter, but will be handy in a moment when life is giving you difficult circumstances.

We all have much in common. It is sad when someone tells you that they are willing to void all of those parallels. I see in us all, the treasure that we long to attain, and one day... When all of my friends are tired of chasing the dragon, I will be here, ever ready to embrace you with my mind and heart, friend.

"Insanity is just the mind freeing itself, but then over indulging in it's rewards." ~Robert Hammac

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! and MUCH LOVE..

Robert